Extra Inning Softball is running a series of articles with record-setting college softball coach Mike Lotief who—after 17 years of coaching Louisiana Ragin’ Cajuns softball— reveals the training program that propelled his team to the NCAA tournament, the Women’s College World Series, and NCAA Super Regionals.
Our series on Mental Swing Attractors continues with this week’s article encouraging our young athletes to push themselves through hard work and struggles and adversity and explaining that—when they do push—there is meaning and purpose that comes with that strong mindset.
Here is the latest feature from Mike dealing with the mental side of the game and how to be successful off the field, too.
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THOSE THAT FAILURE CANNOT BREAK ARE THOSE THAT BECOME CHAMPIONS
Everybody fails.
“If you’re not failing often, you’re not trying anything significant & worthwhile.”
In sports, failure is built into the game. Dealing with failure is part of the challenge athletes must learn to cope with.
When an athlete fails, it is usually “on the big stage,” so everybody can witness it. And then it gets replayed over and over again on the TV highlights.
In sports, there is always going to be someone who wins and someone who loses; someone who had success and someone who failed. If it is a pitcher-hitter dual, one will win and one will fail. Once teams get into the play-offs, one team will advance (win) and one team will not (fail).
Failure is part of the process; NOBODY is exempt from it. NOBODY.
What distinguishes us is HOW WE DEAL WITH IT. Failure will either break you or make you! Abraham Lincoln defined success as going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.
When you think of Abraham Lincoln, what is the first thing that comes to your mind?
- President of the United States of America ✔️
- Honest Abe ✔️
- 4 score and 7 years ago ✔️
- The Civil War ✔️
- FAILURE???
Abe Lincoln and failure do not seem to go together from what I learned in American history. But Lincoln may be the most famous “ICON” in American politics who overcame failure to achieve great success.
The following are a listing of his failures:
- Defeated for legislature, 1832
- Failed in business, 1833
- Sweetheart (Ann Rutledge) died, 1835
- Had nervous breakdown, 1836
- Defeated for Speaker, 1838
- Defeated for nomination for Congress, 1843
- Lost renomination to Congress, 1848
- Rejected for Land Officer, 1849
- Defeated for Senate, 1854
- Defeated for nomination for Vice-President, 1856
- Again defeated for Senate, 1858
Most of us would QUIT or not “run for office again” after losing. Lincoln lost 7 elections!
After the second or third time, most of us would be content with our failure and say “it’s not meant to be.”
Losing and failure bring unpleasant emotions and feelings and thoughts. Those broken by failure are haunted by unpleasant memories. Those memories are like shadows that lurk everywhere — in front, behind, beside, beneath and above.
It is also a cage that traps the mind, preventing it from entertaining the possibilities of success.
After monumental failures, there are many who are convinced that they cannot do it; therefore, they will never try again; they will never put themselves in “that position” to experience those unpleasant thoughts, feelings and emotions ever again.
QUIZ QUESTION: WHICH NBA BASKETBALL PLAYER IS THE FOLLOWING QUOTE ATTRIBUTED TO? [Answer at the end of the article!]
FOR THOSE THAT FAILURE CANNOT BREAK ARE THOSE WHO BECOME CHAMPIONS.
FAILURE to them is not a ghost, but A FRIEND who taught them well. It is also a steppingstone to wisdom.
They are convinced that true failure only happens when one gives up. We are all of frail humanity; we all have moments where we are fragile; but the game gives us chances to redeem ourselves and go at it again and an opportunity to prove that we will never give up.
Those champions are resolved not to let the failures break them – but instead, use it as an opportunity to build character and learn and grow from the experience, so the next time we are stronger and maybe a little less fragile and frail and thus tougher to break.
To me, that is the greatest lesson of Abraham Lincoln.
After every failure or lost election, he may have been temporarily broken, but he “stayed at it” and “moved on stronger” and kept pursuing his dreams and the world is better for it.
For example, in 1832, the same year Lincoln was defeated for the state legislature, he was elected company captain of the Illinois militia and he was appointed postmaster.
In 1834 he was elected to the Illinois state legislature just a year after failing in business. After his sweetheart died (1835) and he had a nervous breakdown (1836), Lincoln found the resolve to be re-elected to Illinois state legislature in 1836 and also received his license to practice law in Illinois state courts (1836).
After being defeated for nomination to Congress in 1843, Lincoln was elected to Congress in 1846. In 1854, he was elected to Illinois state legislature but declined the seat to run for U.S. Senate.
After being defeated for the US Senate seat in 1854, then being defeated in his nomination for Vice-President in 1856 and then again being defeated for the U.S. Senate in 1858, he was elected PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA.
FAILURES DO NOT STOP CHAMPIONS!
They keep moving forward. If you experience defeat, that does not mean you are a failure. Failures are only permanent if we stop trying. The only real failure is the failure not to move on. The ONLY way to deal with failure is to learn from it and move on. For those that FAILURE CANNOT BREAK are those that become CHAMPIONS!
Success and failure go together. You don’t have one without the other.
Lincoln had to be a great politician to win the elections he won; if you continue to run for election, eventually you are going to lose or experience failure – especially if you continue to set your goals higher and higher; i.e. Lincoln went from running for the state legislature to Congress to U.S. Senate to Vice-President and then President. As these competitors and teams continue to aspire to win and have success at higher and higher levels, we all realize that the risks of failure increases exponentially.
The MLB baseball player has gone through the minors and AAA and bus rides and has proven himself to be worthy of this chance to fail on the big stage by being highly talented and successful.
The most valuable lessons learned about any organization or team or politician or general are not the listing of the championships nor the epic collapses; what is admirable, is IF the organization or person is committed to winning and is COMMITTED TO EXCELLENCE, DESPITE THE FAILURES.
And after those failures, did they continue to do what is necessary to put themselves in a position to have success.
Here are some thoughts from champions who experienced failure and did not break. Use their thought processes to help you deal with failure successfully. Refuse to break!
- Henry Ford believed that “Failure is only an opportunity to begin again more intelligently.”
- “The greatest general is he who makes the fewest mistakes.” – Napoleon Bonaparte
- St. Augustine said: “It is human to err, but it is devilish to remain willfully in error.”
- Confucius said, “A man who has committed a mistake and doesn’t correct it is committing another mistake.”
- “I think and think for months, for years. Ninety-nine times the conclusion is false. The hundredth time I am right,” according to Albert Einstein.
- Pro golfing legend Lee Trevino said, “We all choke, and the man who says he doesn’t choke is lying like hell.”
We all leak oil…
We are all fragile, and “leaking oil”, ready to burst at the wrong time, BUT by being secure in your human imperfection AND by learning and growing from each experience, and remaining resolved to keep chasing after success, failure cannot break you.
… AND FOR THOSE THAT FAILURE CANNOT BREAK ARE THOSE THAT BECOME CHAMPIONS!
Some of our greatest players at ULL kept going, no matter the ups or downs, and the results were spectacular:
… Quiz answer: Michael Jordan!